How about exactly zero! 

A day off work and no one made Steeplechase Finals! To the tune of one dog who ran slowly and stealthily UNDER the a-frame to give stink eye to a very sweet YOUNG man judge, before running up and over and to a nice fast finish. After barking at a judge in her Standard as she ran over and down the a-frame. Oh MAN. And maybe another dog who after a manic morning of speed with errors, just sort of pooped around Steeplechase all blase and what is wrong with my dogs? I think we got some Q’s, and in some stuff not some Q’s. No Gamblers Q’s! Ha HA!

But I can say that Gustavo played frisbee out on the field and came every single time I called him! So now there’s looking on some sunny side up! Yes, every single time! Like I would say, “Come!” and he would just come running! This doesn’t sound desperate, right? I was serious happy and proud of that. And he even brought back the frisbee a couple a times.

You know that cheery song by Ween, You F*&cked UP? I was listening to that song on the way home. I saw a big dead roadkill turkey on the side of the road and a teepee out there by the Latino rodeo spot. I forgot to bring my camera. Little snapshot camera, since I f%#cked up and killed my dad’s nice camera. Hopefully recovering at the camera hospital in Illinois. Anyways, and was thinking, how come I am not the lady that just kicks ass every single dog agility course every single time? They say, “Come and join the world team kick ass lady!” Instead I am the lady that kinda screws up. Even when I’m thinking I did an ok job?

OK. Maybe don’t answer that. Unless you have the exact solution for me that will work. But I do try!

And I thought, if I was a proper weepy competitor, I could curl up and wish to die and just be so bummed. Emo girl. Morose. Switch to all black clothes and big eyeliner scrawls around my slitty stink eyes. How age inappropriate would that be? Of the fact we don’t exactly get better anymore, that we sort of just have dogs shows like this. Use that emo to drive some better competitive spirit home and get better. 

Instead, repeat performance of some barking at judges and slow moments and crashing through bars and careening off the table. And I’m in the car and merging onto super fast hwy 1 traffic, just driving fast and screaming along with the Weens super loud and just thinking it was still an a-0k day. And maybe tomorow, it’s a better day. Maybe it’s not. Not sure how to try harder, not sure how to try better. But like for now, we can just be rockstars in my mind maybe and then have a nice big slice of cheesecake for dinner.